Is depression a symptom of Autism?

[Katie]

Recently a few of my siblings children have been diagnosed with Austism, and I wondered if perhaps I may have slight autism myself. Since I can remember I've been anxious about social situations and I've always considered my self sensitive emotionally, although sometimes I come off as quite cold. I've never been a really touchy-feely person, and hugging people makes me uncomfortable, although I can do it, and I do do it if I feel it is necassary. I do not, however have any problems hugging or showing emotion towards my children, which my husband says I would have if I was autistic. I am pretty uncomfortable even being touchy-feely with my parents. I am extremely imaginitve. I believe I have slight dyslexia as well, as I am unable to differientiate my left from my right. I am very sensitive to scolding. As a child, a teacher could look at me wrong and I would feel my stomach drop and this continues today. For instance, I picked up a baby rabbit today and the owner, not harshy, but firmly told me he'd rather me not pick them up..he didn't want me to pick them up, and I was very hurt, did not show it, but inside I was terribly hurt. I am a huge animal lover by the way. I've always had friends growing up, but all my friendships have felt very superficial. (Even my few 1-2 close friends I felt ackward hugging, or touching). I am also very emotionally removed from my spouse, and it feels like a hurdle I can not get over. He stresses that he wants me to be so, but it just feels wrong. I moved to a new town 6 years ago, and I've since to make any real friends. I am terribly scared of getting emotionally hurt, and people tend to do that to you. I've always thought I was friendly, but recently my husband's grandfather commented that I have been more friendly lately, since I started taking adderall for ADHD. I don't know... I've just always felt this intense feeling of being alone, and I wondered if that might be contributed to Autism?
One more thing I remembered...I am also extremely uncomfortable around people who are upset, crying etc. What do you think?

[Aspen]

I'm not sure what to think, but I want to welcome you to Gestalt.

Maybe you could have some social anxiety in the mix but nothing you described really sounds like depression to me.

[adhocisadirtyword]

Hi Katie, welcome to gestalt. It definitely sounds to me like you should look into Asperger's and autism more. While it may not be an answer to everything, a lot of it seems like it fits.

Note that being able to hug your kids (or anyone for that matter) would not exclude an ASD from consideration. I have two kids, a great marriage and a successful career. There are a lot of myths out there, so be careful when doing your research.

I am also sensitive to scolding. Never really considered that an aspie thing. Interesting.

[goddessoflubbock]

Hi Katie and welcome!!!

The scolding thing has actually been the one hurdle we have yet to surmount with my DS who is an aspie. Not only does he get very upset and frustrated when things don't work out, but if I have to specifically punish or scold him for a misdeed he has serious problems and will throw things in his room.

He oncee hit his wall that adjoins the living room so hard it knocked the clock off the living room side and it fell and broke.

[renaeden]

I don't think depression is a symptom of autism but it sure comes with it some of the time. I am autistic and have been in hospital with depression a number of times. I found it easier to have my depression treated if I didn't talk about autism to the hospital staff, otherwise it just complicated things. Sad but true.

I am sensitive to criticism too but I think I have gotten better at handling it as I have gotten older.

And I understand your discomfort with being around people who are upset. I never know what the right thing to do is in those situations.

I agree with adhoc about reading more about Asperger's/autism. Hope you find some answers.

And welcome to Gestalt.

[Sophist]

After years of having studied myself, gotten a diagnosis, and gone on to study the larger autism itself in a professional sense, each day I'm learning more and more how individual we all are. How nothing is set in stone and, while our genetics plays a role, that it is not the entire determinant to our own personal adaptability.

More and more do I view autism as one end of a general human continuum, and people towards the autism end tend to have more severe expression of these traits which, at their root, are very human. The people who have the more severe expressions may find the diagnosis beneficial.

My advice is that if there are aspects of autism which ring true to yourself, then use them for what they are. Let them give you some guidance in better understanding yourself, or at least attempting to understand yourself in a different light, and if that improves your life at all then the time and consideration has not been wasted, no matter what any other person might tell you.

There is no "autism" when it comes to genetics, epigentics, or behavior. They are simply trends in embryonic development and human behavior. They may have some similar root causes, but ultimately each person is exceptionally unique and cannot be defined or boxed in in such a way. It's taken me a number of years to learn this about myself. While initially the label helped me to gain focus, after a time instead it became a box which I have since shed. I still realize there are issues I deal with that may be more classically considered "autistic" and may have some common root causes I share with other people who have similar experiences, but a label doesn't make me something more or something less than what I was before. Instead now I tend to view each ability or deficit in its own light and try to accommodate on that level.

I am me; I'm not "an autistic". And you're you. You have a unique approach to adapting to life and the experiences you've had, which is a culmination of your genetics, epigenetics, and learning in general. You are neither predetermined nor a blank slate but in the gray area in between. If there are aspects of autistic behavior that seem to reflect some of your own behaviors, it isn't a bad thing to consider them and to interpret them in such a way. I just hope that you may use the guidance as a tool to understanding yourself and perhaps finally giving yourself permission to have the unique set of abilities and deficits you as a human being have without shame or embarrassent, but to never let such a label be a reason for not growing into the person you strive to become. I hope that, regardless of any label you might take on, that you will strive to value yourself as you are.

Welcome to Gestalt.

[Civet]

This sounds to me more like social anxiety the way you describe it. Maybe there are other issues that are more specifically related to autism or depression that you've left out but what you wrote sounds very "social anxiety" like. I am diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety. I'm not diagnosed with AS but suspect I may have it. I'm just explaining that so you understand my perspective.

As Renaeden said depression is not a symptom of autism but it's often comorbid (meaning they often co-occur). I've dealt with depression off and on throughout my life also. Are you feeling tired or hopeless all the time? Have little to no interest in activities you'd normally enjoy? Sleeping or eating differently than usual (more or less than you normally would?) Have a deep and persistent feeling of sadness? Those are some symptoms of depression.

I still have a hard time sorting out what could be autism and what could be social anxiety in myself. I definitely have a significant degree of social anxiety, though I feel there are other factors at work aside from feeling anxious or judged in social situations for me. One things that can help differentiate is that autism is not strictly a "social disorder." Sensory issues are one of the more prominent and more specifically autism related issues I have as well as the fact that I am often confused when speaking to others and tend to misinterpret what people are saying to me, miss sarcasm, ect. Also, narrow interests, like constantly thinking about or talking about one subject much more so than other people would seem to do. Stimming behaviors can relate to both anxiety disorders and autism though I think with autism they're more prominent. There are also things that are specifically related to ASD like following strict routines, having a resistance to change, etc.