Amazing coping skills and personal growth don't change who you are at your core.
I mostly have just DS to go by, as I have known DH only a third of his life
.Just 5 years ago, DS had meltdowns on a weekly basis. His walls of his bedroom were covered with a dozen or so calendars (including one inside his closet), and going somewhere different for dinner was a six week breaking in process.
Today he has one calendar which he rarely refers to (since he's always asking me for the date!), his meltdowns are few and far between - and far less physical, and we can tell him where we are going for dinner on the way out the door and he's usually fine with it.
He also uses coping skills. His MP3 and phone divert his attention when we are somewhere that is too noisy or different for his comfort level. He needs no accommodations at school, but needs a good half hour when he gets home to decellerate.
Many days, even weeks, he seems like just a typical teenager. (Let's not forget his burgeoning social skills with the ladies). Until he encounters a situation he's not ready for, like the first day of band camp. Someone seeing him at that moment alone would immediately see he is autistic.
It is as much a part of him as his long, sweeping eyelashes.
The same for you Sophist. While you may not constantly realize it, but the way you approach problems, the way you integrate learning, is all done in a somewhat unique way because of your different brain structure.
If you woke up one morning with autism completely erased from your being, you would be a much different person indeed!
I guess the best analogy I can come up with (at this god-awful early hour!)is to compare it with a diabetic (bad analogy I know.)
Just because a diabetic may have their blood sugars tightly controlled so they are in the normal range all the time doesn't mean they aren't diabetic. All seems calm on the surface, but most people don't see the hard work going on underneath to keep that going.
Kind of similar. I'll shut up now
The diabetes analogy is a good one.
